Good morning everybody. So I know in harping on one subject and kind of bouncing back and forth maybe it’s because I’m trying to figure out what I want to do about my future. Writing helps with that as well as reading other blogs on here about relationships. As you know I’m single again have been for three months and although I love the man not sure about that is stopping any time soon I would not be with him again. I think about him all the time and I miss our life together but I could never trust him again. I wish I could because I really, truly miss our life. But I learned a lot of good lessons and after all isn’t that why we have relationships of any kind in our lives. The very romantic, professional or friendships we are meant to learn something from them all.
So now the task of figuring out what I’m going to do obviously. I am making headway in that department. The new apartments working out great I can walk a lot more and I love to walk. I’m getting back to reading, writing, crocheting all the things I haven’t had time to do because looking after him and his house and a fulltime job I didn’t have the time or energy for my interests. I am starting a couple of online courses next week, not really with a professional goal in mind but more just to broaden my horizons, live and learn as they say.
I haven’t given up on the possibility of having a partner or a soulmate what ever you wanna call it but I’m not going to look for it. If it’s meant to happen it’ll happen. Believe it or not for the last three months I’ve put a lot of effort, research, time and work into me. I know what I want and I know what I don’t want when it comes to a relationship and I’m not willing to settle again. Making my partner happy is all I do in a relationship, not anymore. If I’m not happy that I’m not where I need to be. Simple really isn’t it.
Financially I am good, not great but good. Still trying to find something in town but it is a small town so that’s going to take some time and that’s OK too. I have good friends and a good support network without which the last three months may not have been as positive as they have been. I’m lucky to have these people in my life and I know it.
They say you can’t go back and for a lot of my life I’ve tried to do just that. I now know the only way is to go forward, make peace with the past and move on. I’m not saying I’m done learning, life has a way of making that happen but I’m gathering strength and will to learn the new lessons and not repeat the past because one thing I know the past needs to stay just where it is.
So once again onwards and upwards with the only goal being that I am happy.